Infidelity

Where is the line drawn? What is considered as being unfaithful? To some, merely looking at another person with sexual interest would be considered as an act of being unfaithful, when to others it would merely be ‘window shopping’.

I have known some people to be offended by their partners viewing pornography because they felt that they ought to be the only ones to bring them pleasure. Would viewing images of someone they knew personally be seen as being unfaithful, but not of someone who they did not know personally? These are questions that have been thrown up into the air to be considered.

On discussion of this topic, many people become outraged and highly driven by ‘morals’ about how if someone is cheating on their partner it is one of the worst things that they could do. These people tend not to stop and think, “Why are these people having affairs?” “Is there further reason for them to behave in this way?” More often than not, there are reasons why they have unfaithful. For instance, what if they have fallen out of love with their partner. What if there is no physical side, sexual nor comforting touches? These I believe can be seen as not being bad, but out of necessity.

Abraham Maslow in 1943 proposed the theory of human motivation, where he states that humans are also striving for self-actualisation. However, before you can reach self-actualization the needs below this stage must have been fulfilled and continue to be. Below is the Maslows hierarchy of human needs, which is represented in a pyramid, with the most primitive needs at the bottom.

For further information go to:

http://changingminds.org/explanations/needs/maslow.htm

This is why I believe that if someone is not feeling fulfilled in their relationship, that they will strive for it and why should anyone have to deny themselves their basic needs. No one would deny someone food, which is a physical need, but when someone goes elsewhere to receive love and comfort which is an emotional need, people see this as wrong.

Please do not get me wrong, I do not support those who go in search of ‘fun’ or just for a ‘laugh’. Nor do I support those who purposely use sex and infidelity as a power tool. This just leads to broken hearts and no one deserves to have their hearts broken.

The below web page is an information site on relationships and looks at infidelity, providing reasons for it and also gives examples of what to look for if you do believe your partner is having an afair:

http://images.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=http://www.armchairadvice.co.uk/relationships/images/insets/lipstickshirt.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.armchairadvice.co.uk/relationships/saving/common/infidelity.asp&h=165&w=200&sz=34&hl=en&start=39&um=1&tbnid=HmgcnH6Y_4KC7M:&tbnh=86&tbnw=104&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dinfidelity%26start%3D21%26ndsp%3D21%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN